Monday, May 09, 2011


Saturday Night with L.E.S. Jewels

What with the intimidating success of gentrification at displacing so many of  those once responsible for genuine neighborhood farce , L.E.S. Jewels' regular alcoholic performances are about all that is left of spontaneous Saturday night entertainments .

Nothing new here this Saturday night at Ray's . Jewels did not disappoint . He began the evening  by being drunk on his ass .  Jewels bemused the editor of a local news paper ; prostrated himself at the feet of beautiful women then rolled supine bellowing and , as cynic Diogenes , masturbated in the agora out front of Ray's ....while his former love was working just through the window of the candy store .

Later in the evening Jewels shared some camaraderie with fellow drinkers , then sat down on the avenue A sidewalk and quietly nursed a bagged can of malt liquor  .

I thought this was Keith Ledger reprising his role as The Joker, but even the dead Ledger looks better than this guy!
Forget about "where's a cop when you need one" -- how about "Where are the guys with the butterfly nets when you need them?"
the distinction is difficult to make but for one thing , Jewels is amazingly still alive .

...and yes Chris nets .... maybe some bug spray too
Does Amy have anything to do with him anymore?
Ha!Reminds me of the time we put a wino in the principals office at my old school on 2nd st.
Amy occaisionally talks to him .She rarely calls him Joel(his given name ) though . Almost always Jewels now .A change in perspective and progress too .
Haha, just tell Ray he needs to put the garden hose on Jewels just like his grandmother used to.

By the way, gnip gnop, it was Heath Ledger, and Jewels is emulating Bobby Ebs, who wanted to be GiGi Allin, not Heath.

Bob, did you ever get Bobby on film? He used to live on crusty row in TSP with a blond girl named Denise. This was in the mid '90's, Jewels was still a functioning member of society with a job and a home. Bobby and Denise went to visit him and he told me Denise had lost an eye, and they were basically living on whatever lunchmeat and such she could steal from the shops near TSP...
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